Traditions are actions we repeat yearly, monthly, or daily. They help to keep us grounded and connected to the past; they can be elaborate celebrations or simple endeavors. These customs enrich our lives and create lasting memories. They take an ordinary activity and turn it into something meaningful and special. Family traditions are especially important for children because they help to shape the child’s identity and belief system. When a tradition is connected to a family’s culture or history, the child grows up with a stronger image of who he or she is which leads to having higher confidence levels and feeling more secure.

Doing the same thing every night or every second Saturday of the month or every winter may at first glance seem monotonous or boring. However, if the action is intentional, meaningful, and dependable, the event can be comforting and reassuring. There are so many things in life you can’t count on; but something as simple as pizza every Friday night, or as special as a night out on your birthday or anniversary will give you something to look forward to.

Traditions are also important because they impart and perpetuate family values. When children are read a bedtime story each night, they learn that reading is delightful entertainment and education is important. When younger generations learn how to cook meals from their grandmother, they learn more than how not to burn the biscuits. They learn family customs and heritage, as well as how to connect the past to the present. Even chores can become a tradition. When families have “work day” on Saturday mornings, children learn to pick up after themselves and to be accountable. I remember sweeping the front porch with my grandmother every weekend. Now, when I sweep my porch, I remember our sweet time together. These seemingly small traditions strengthen family ties. Accidental events can also lead to beloved rituals. A young child may innocently change the words to a well-known song; adults may sing along until the “new words” become accepted as customary. Hardships can also lead to cherished memories and traditions. As a young wife and mother, there was not much money to spare in our household—especially during the Christmas holiday. There was however, a mountain full of pine trees on our property. Each Thanksgiving Day we trekked out to find a Christmas tree to cut down, bring inside, and decorate. What began as a way to save money became a fun outing each year. Our “Charlie Brown” trees were not impressive to others, but to our family, they were magnificent.

Christmas, Hanukkah, and the Winter Solstice are traditionally the perfect time to start and continue traditions. These cold-weather celebrations usually include some sort of fire (bonfires and candles), food (sugar cookies and turkey), songs (Jingle Bells and Greensleeves), and decorations (paper snowflakes and live poinsettias). Clothing is also used as a sign of celebration. My young children came up with their own scheme; each Christmas Eve they wore red and green pajamas. If one wore a red top and green bottoms, the other wore a green top with red bottoms. The sweet part of this tradition is that they came up with the idea on their own and kept it alive for many years.

Another meaningful tradition is to have a “releasing ceremony.” This is an intentional effort to release goals and dreams for the upcoming year, or to release regrets of the past year. It’s often accomplished by writing your intentions or regrets on a slip of paper or block of wood, and then burning it. The visual of watching the paper or wood burn as the smoke rises is a powerful image. It symbolically
releases the dream—or the burden—allowing you to begin the new year with clarity and resolve.

Traditions that have a purpose and are personal to your family make wonderful memories—whether they are simple or extravagant. This busy time of gathering and feasting is balanced with simple traditions of quietly watching sunsets and sipping hot chocolate. Whatever your traditions are and whatever new traditions you begin, I hope your holiday is merry!